I Take Their Turn, Every Turn | Brewer's Kitchen
Well, hello there! Brewer’s Kitchen here and today we’re trying to assemble the most brutal stax lock I’ve ever seen. Not only will we stop our opponent from playing the game, we will literally play the game instead of them.
The Gameplan
With the addition of Pioneer Masters, we finally got Worst Fears on Arena. For eight mana, we control the opponent during their next turn. That means we take their turn, with their deck, instead of them. And unlike Emrakul, the Promised End, they don’t get an extra turn afterwards to mitigate the damage we’ve done.
Now as brutal as this effect is, Worst Fears will exile itself to prevent loops. Otherwise, we could just assemble a lock that prevents the opponent from ever taking a turn again…
What’s this? Arcane Bombardment? It can exile spells from our graveyard and cast copies of them every turn. Turns out we found a way to loop Worst Fears after all. Now we just to to make it happen. Sadly, that’s where we run into some problems. Not only is Arcane Bombardment six mana, we also need to get Worst Fears into our graveyard, and then randomly exile it. And as if all of this wasn’t hard enough, we kinda need cards like Dark Ritual and Noxious Revival, so we have to play the Timeless format. Needless to say I got absolutely destroyed recording games for this video. But good thing I only have to show you the cool ones.
The gameplan is relatively simple: Use Growth Spiral, Explore, Strike It Rich, and Dark Ritual to ramp out the Bombardment. Then use Faithless Looting and Prismari Command to put Worst Fears into the graveyard.
After that, it’s just a matter of time until we hit the Fears with the Bombardment trigger. Then the game is locked. The opponent will only have control of their deck in our turn. As long as we make sure to always tap their mana, they will not do a single thing for the rest of the game. Now you could try to use their own deck to kill them but most likely they will just scoop it up as soon as they realize what’s happening. If they don’t, we have to shock them to death with Prismari Command.
Now would it be a good idea to put a Delve spell like Dig Through Time in here to exile all other spells from our graveyard, making sure we hit the Worst fears with Bombardment? Yes… I kinda forgot about this… Also, what would I even cut for it? I already gaslit myself into justifying playing 65 cards so “we mill out last” … But then again, you could also just play an extra turn spell like Temporal Manipulation to make the deck significantly better… Let’s be honest here, this might be one of the most gimmicky decks I’ve built yet.
Wrap up
Please don’t spend any wild cards to craft this deck. I recorded for over 12 hours and ended up with a 33% winrate. And that was after my matchmaking started matching me with random piles that accidentally queued into Timeless ranked. There’s probably a semi viable version of a Bombardment deck with interaction and extra turns somewhere. But that would be less interesting for content. So, let’s just enjoy the games I recorded and keep the wild cards for playable decks or brawl staples.
If you have questions or ideas for this or any other deck, you can reach me on Twitter @Brewers_Kitchen or at brewerskitchen@mtggoldfish.com.
